GOOGLE HOLLOW WEE E'EN NIGH CAUCHEMAR!!!

MY GOOGLE HOLLOW'EEEEN NIGHTMARE-COUCHEMAR!!!

i'm hoping that one of the people who regularly comment on this site:

Image via CrunchBase

i call them my atomic posters, will take pity on me about my current status (unknown because it is the most fucking incredibly complicated and ridiculous process for anyone who doesn't have a degree in computer engineering which you are likely and hopefully fortunate enough to never encounter), because this is

Image via CrunchBase

MY GOOGLE HOLLOW WEE E'EN NIGH CAUCHEMAR!!!

Welcome to the Crawling, Indexing and Ranking section of the Google Webmaster Help Forum.

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Here you can find answers and ask questions about pages or websites ...
 - that are not getting crawled
 - that are encountering indexing issues
 - that are not appearing in the Search Engine Results Pages (SERPs)
 - that are ranking lower than you believe they should be


Before you post your question about crawling, indexing or ranking, please:
 - Read the FAQ:
     http://sites.google.com/site/webmasterhelpforum/en/faq--crawling--indexing---ranking

 - Check the Help Center:
     http://www.google.com/support/webmasters/

 - Search for previous topics and answers:
     http://www.google.com/support/webmasters/bin/search.py?query=more:forum


You may also want to read/visit the following informative/useful resources:
 - Google Webmaster Guidelines:
     http://www.google.com/support/webmasters/bin/answer.py?answer=35769
 - Google SEO Starter Guide:
     http://www.google.com/webmasters/docs/search-engine-optimization-starter-guide.pdf

 - Google Webmaster Central Blog:
     http://googlewebmastercentral.blogspot.com/


If you do post a topic/question, please be patient and wait at least a few hours for a reply (sometimes we do get a little busy here). Also make sure that you include all relevant information, such as the URL or URLs involved.


Keep in mind that posts in this forum are crawled, indexed and will be shown in search results. If you do not want your topic appearing in search results when people search for your website or business name, please use a URL shortening service such as http://cli.gs/ to mask your website's URL.

If you have a question about Webmaster Tools, verification in Webmaster Tools, Sitemaps or malware/hacked sites, please go to the appropriate section in this forum (see the sidebar for more details).  For questions regarding Google Maps, Chrome, Gmail or other Google products and services, please see the following list of specialized forums: http://www.google.com/support/bin/static.py?page=portal_groups.cs&hl=en

Any site-specific questions or off-topic posts will be deleted from this thread; please start a separate thread if you have a specific questions.

P.S. -- You may be more likely to receive attention from expert forum members and Googlers if you sincerely note the secret phrase: "I have studied the Help Center, read the FAQs and searched for similar questions."

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