When Doug was fourteen Abbot Rossini took Doug to Venice to see the famous Venetian Circus of Bernoulli Cardalini. Mesmerized by the skillful hijinks of the buff ones (clowns) Doug plotted to sneak away from the Abbot by volunteering for the disappearing act during the circus' grand finale -- he never reappeared. Over the years with the circus, Doug cemented his reputation as one of Italy's finest clowns and was became known as Ill Professor.
After a tragic clown car accident in 1978 in which his face was rendered inhospitable to clown noses, it seemed as though Doug's circus days were over. He retired to his native Iceland to recover and it was there that Doug was visited by an apparition that was either the ghost of Elvis, Napoleon or both. Regardless, the other-worldly message was clear--get to Memphis! Not one to tempt fate, Doug got on the next Greyhound to Memphis.
Memphis proved to be a good fit for Il Professorfe. His training in the musical arts proved invaluable to the burgeoning underground rock scene and his years in the circus prepared him for the characters of Midtown Memphis. At a fateful recording session on which Doug had been hired to sing background vocals he stumbled into the control room and thinking that the mixing console was a fancy microwave he began randomly punching buttons in order to heat up his favorite libation, hot apple cider. That session was Disco Duck and Doug had unwittingly engineered a number one hit and after that he became Memphis' most in-demand producer and engineer.
Throughout the eighties, nineties and naughtiest Doug would go on to work on records by Loretta Lynn, The White Stripes, The Ted Kennedys, Sonic Youth, Pavement, Elvis Parsley, Cat Power, Jeff Buckley, Townes Van Zandt, The legendary Ernestine and Hazel's House Band (who is available for your next party), Our Favorite Band and I'm running out of breath. During a trans-European tour via golf cart Doug was reunited with Abbot Rossini and the Abbot confided that he had orchestrated the Venetian disappearance and that it was he who had appeared to him and not the ghost of Elvis, Napoleon or both. He had, however, held a flashlight up to his face for effect.
The former mistress of Mr. Sebastian Z / lost *[::] in a game on a certain ABBA chorus. S / Z, Malmö's answer to the question, "Where is IKEA, or should I go fuck me", posted image back in the day, and JB the 'wet'. S / Z red his electric, eclectic Mother Ship of famous PCL LINK DUMPING. [::] Used to go by "VisualGuidanceltd" was his mistress, but a gentleman all the way, S / Z, at our games, paid her to "Yours faithfully" as Charles Mingus on a major party, to do all in hell I wanted to. I turned her, made her walk across the street and let her come back home, then had "to talk", when dad is not here no more, it will be swell, and do not pay any regard to my main ol 'lady of the mrjyn.blogspot [an offensive slut who eat only the Koreans for breakfast and integrated GER 2 fuck 'bout nothing].
But after I got her, and starts peepin 'her catalog, I realized,
"This ho hoipoloi'd with some immediately cats & finely chop ol' ladies. [some of them even send swingin 'friends here.]Yes sir, S / Z, the situation well as wine on Valentine: "n'other words" Javel took her to church and everything else, and she is still not worth a shit ", but she was a damn site better than one of these second streetwalkin "bitches crackin 'up in the corner of" Blogspot and Main'! So I am not talking out of school if I fat S / Z's pimp hand and says:
"Mr Dante Fontana GOTS good taste in tasty bitches." Halloween 2009, I tricked and treated me to my first rule of S / Z's ol 'moll, and although I hate to say it [S / Z is man enough to take it], "bitch came all the stops!" Later, as a true pimp is not used to pay out, S / Z know when to cut-and-run. All is all, the only thing I changed was her name [followed li'l purple-paisley pimp prince of the trip]. She is not any work at all, except occasionally in the beginning to any WASTER cat out of his book, but she do not mind, cuz she stays around the house and keeps and keeps it as if I like it, and I like it fine. Thanks S / Z, and do not think I have not figured out that you might play out with her anyway. I knew you knew ABBA lyrical - you have a talk about you as a teenager at a Tokyo Hotel concert. [trivia: the [::] glyph came from a brainstorm to find a western keyboard-friendly rep. of a TV screen, inspired by the late, Lux Interior and co. 's' TV Set']
